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Posts Tagged ‘fly’

black butterfly

We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.

Maya Angelou

Ever since I can remember, I have imagined myself wrapped in a sweet cocoon of warmth and safety. Knowing that I can stay there until I am ready to spread my wings and fly. Sometimes I even imagine that I may stay there forever.

Life is full of so many moving and overwhelming parts. On a good day, our hearts and minds are in a good place with a realistic to do list that needs our attention. But the hard days are not far behind. On those days, our hearts are broken open and in need of mending while the to do list goes on for miles.

On the later days, I love the idea of spinning a cocoon around myself with the aspirations of navigating what will ultimately become a deeply reflective transformation.

Only through going inward, can I honor the deepest parts of who I am and who I want to become. While my stories have often empowered me to be the woman I am, they also need to be released in order to birth an even more vibrant me – not so different from shedding the cocoon so that I can fly and reach new heights.

In the last few years, I have been celebrating how perfectly imperfect I really am. My flaws and vulnerabilities are part of a bigger picture – maybe even a masterpiece in the making. I am a spiritual warrior whose resilience has made it possible for me to thrive as I have.

While there may be times when my brokenness leaves me navigating the darkness, more often than not, I am able to take the pain and emerge into a better spiritual space much as the caterpillar emerges a butterfly.

There is so much healing that needs to take place inside of me and around me right now, so for just a little while I will spin the cocoon and allow for the quiet to soothe my spirit. At the end of this journey, may I be ready to take flight and soar to new heights.

With love, light, healing, and blessings,
Chava

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Note: I will be Counting the Omer for a total of 49 days, from Passover to Shavuot or from Slavery to Freedom.  For many, this is simply the Counting the Omer; for others, it is a tool for exploring the kabbalistic teachings in an organized way.  For me, it is a time to actively reflect on my Journey Towards Wholeness.  The more I am whole, the more free I will become.

Western Minnesota Photo Courtesy of Randall Miller

Photo Courtesy of Randall Miller Western Minnesota

I thrive on living authentically and being transparent within my writing and in all human interactions. That does not mean that I always succeed, but it is my work.  My hope is that you will find interesting stories or thoughts and if I am skilled perhaps some tools of how you may or may not approach your own life’s journey.

Wholeness refers to completeness or shalem in Hebrew.  Being full of wholeness means we feel spiritually healthy and undivided or in one piece.  (Dictionary.com) Personally, I would add that when we are in a place of wholeness, we are living in a world of Godliness, conscious of a higher power and/or the responsibility we have to the larger world, the universe.

The last 18 months forced me to do a cheshbon hanefesh (inventory of the soul).  For the first time in my life, I lost my livelihood due to budget cuts and had to examine what I was really looking for professionally and personally. Status quo stopped working for me and I needed to dig deeply and decide what jazzes my soul, what compromises my values, and what I wanted in life.  While my sons are ages 18 and 21, I am still responsible for supporting them and giving them the wings they need to fly.  At the same times, I needed to figure out what I needed so that my entire being could flourish and succeed at the highest level.

So over the following 48 days, you will have a chance to read what is important to me, what I struggle with, and the work that I am doing to reach a myriad of goals.

I am a work in progress. My hope is to share the real me including blemishes, warts, and beauty within ever entry of My Journey Towards Wholeness. Being transparent isn’t easy, but I have been blessed with amazing women in my life who are also writers and artists; my hope is that they will keep me honest and remind me to let the fullness of my being emerge within my writing.

At this point, I’d l want to thank Randall Miller for the beautiful photo taken in one of the many lakes of Minnesota. This photo seems to be guiding me in the right direction. Randall’s photos always move my heart, but this photo has captured my heart. As someone who loves water, it is this photo that seems to be saying it is ok to float and tread water, but know that there is a lot of holy distance to travel.

Thank you for taking the time to join me in my journey.

With love, light, and blessings,
Chava

PS – Carolyn Riker, my new friend and fellow blogger/writer, helped me find the name for my blog series.  I love that I have learned to ask for help over the past few years.

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