Never in my wildest dreams did I expect that I would be staying awake all night so that I could care for someone other than family or friends. Nor did I ever expect that I would lose half of my income and my health insurance for any reason at all. I have always been blessed with fulfilling work that compensates me. So it goes. . . .
Twists and turns can often accompany life’s journeys.
Today, I am working nearly full-time as a care-giver and another 20 hours a week as a Director of Education at a temple. I am doing what I need to do to care for my family. And through it all, I love how I can touch someone’s life and make a difference for good. All it take is just a gentle touch, a helpful hand, or a listening ear. It really is that simple.
While I could choose to be resentful that I moved to Tucson for a position that now does not sustain my family, I am working on navigating away from that kind of energy; it doesn’t serve me well. I have a soul to protect, two sons to support, and lots of holy work to do. I am blessed even as I struggle.
A few years ago, I wrote a blog, Hineini – Here I Am, http://wp.me/pthnB-2a. Acknowledging that I am now here to serve others and to be more present in this world was important to me at the time. Even now, I find myself excited that I am on this earth to make a difference for others either as a Jewish educator or a care-giver, as a mother or a friend or as a human being. Hineini.
None of this is simple, but I am figuring out how the next leg of my journey will look. I now have a chance to reflect on what is important to me, what do I want to accomplish in the short and long run, and I get to assess how I feel at each step and then make decisions on how I will get where I want to go.
In the meantime, I am care-giving in every way. Senior citizens. Religious School community. My family. Life is the gift that keeps moving forward, so I will continue to do exactly I need to do.
Hanging on for life’s roller coaster ride into the future. . . .wondering what the next twists and turns will bring my family.