Archive for April, 2011

While I was sitting shiva (mourning during the first week following a funeral) for my mother, my sister-in-law Eudice and I went to the grocery store.  I know I wasn’t supposed to leave the shiva house, but I did.  When have I ever followed rules?

The grocery store was a great place to run away to.  While it was nothing special; it was a moment to get away from everyone, a moment to breathe.

As Eudice and I were walking out of the grocery store, one of us mentioned something about my mother’s craziness; she really was a nut case.  As soon as we opened our mouths to speak about this, a robin started darting towards us.  It was surreal.  I had never seen a robin fly into my space.

This experience began a year-long period of time where there was often a robin by my side.  The robin joined me when I walked the dogs and when I strolled; wherever I was so was a robin.  As the year progressed, I found it uncanny that my dogs that were always hunting birds ignored the robin.  The dogs would share their space with a small robin and they would fail to bark or open their mouths wide for a nibble.  Fascinating!

Well nearly 20 years since I saw the last robin join my every step, I now have a new robin joining my many journeys.  Who knows how longs she will hang out with me.  And again, I am finding it uncanny that my dogs don’t seem to mind having a robin follow us around.

Perhaps I will start calling her Mira; which we believe is my mother’s Hebrew name.  Either way, it is interesting to have Marilyn’s company.  I wonder why she has come back into my life now.  Does she have something to share?  Does she want me to know something that I wouldn’t realize without her presence in my life?  Or do I need her protection?

As a child and a young woman, I was never safe in her presence, but somehow now I am finding her comforting.  Maybe after 21 years, I am finding my way to heal.

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